Please think about it and understand...

People have been saying to me. That, I'm lucky to be able to stay home and study in a university at the same time. And I always say to them: "I am not lucky. You are." Have anybody who've asked me this question before, thought about why I said I'm not lucky?

I'll tell you why, and it has nothing to do with "it". See, everyone left KL. You are either in Penang, Kuantan, Johor or Serdang. I'm in KL. Just so happen that I have to study in KL doesn't mean I am lucky in every bit. I don't feel lucky at all. I feel empty instead. Every single time I drive around town, there's this emptiness that surrounds me. I don't feel at home either. Everyday on my way to UTAR, I pass through two friends' homes. Knowing that they are not in there, it gives you an emptiness to think about. At least when I'm heading home, I can be too tired to think of anything. Every time I go home from Selayang, I pass through even more friends' houses. Especially the one at the roundabout that stood out where our class' second biggest Megaphone lives, each houses that I pass through... They're all... Empty... Every time I drive around town, I feel it. Alone, left alone.

You've never stopped to think what it is like, didn't you? You always say it's harder for you because you're in a new place, it's harder for you because you don't know anyone there. Have you have any idea of how it feels like when there's no one around you anymore? And that you're the only one here, and no one new to get to know? I would not say it's harder for me, but I do know one thing, it's equally hard for both of us. Just give abit of thought of how it feels like being left alone in the neighbourhood. I don't need any advice on how to endure it or the need to endure this emptiness. Just understand it. No words needed.

As time passes... We all grow older... I've grown older... I'm starting to forget how it feels like holding someone's hands... I'm starting to forget the purpose of the feeling. The feeling seems to have no purposes anymore... Anybody else is like a LP670-4 SV, or a R35, or a real life transforming truck, or an ordinary truck, or a normal car, or an awfully old car, or a beautiful lady or an ugly old hag... Nothing... They, Are All, Nothing. Just, another, object, exsisting, in this, world. Meaningless, pointless... F430 Scuderia used to make me drool, now it's just another car... GT queens used to be something I look at after all the NSXs and GT-Rs, now it's mere ignorable dust... I've got a missing part... Can anyone help me find it?

Occasional snaps of my student card while being jammed up between The Curve and Amatu1.

Being jammed up is just BORING!!!